Thursday, December 24, 2009

Maria in the Mainframe - Part 3

The story for my niece continues with this third installment...

If you are wondering
What kind of bug Zentz is
Well, he kind of resembles
A praying mantis
He’s an unsavory fellow
All mean and evil
Like a locust, a termite
A louse or a weevil
For there is nothing in this world
That Zentz likes as well
As turning a computer
Into a useless shell
So how does he do it?
This nasty insect
Attaches himself to
An e-mail or diskette
And if you load that disc
Or open that attachment
You’ll wonder where all of
Your computer files went
Because he devours data
In the wink of an eye
He can do heavy damage
To any hard drive
What use is a computer
That’s been ravaged by Zentz?
Well it might make an attractive
Planter for plants

And that’s what Zentz
Would normally have done
If it wasn’t for this little girl
He’d chanced upon
“I must get rid of her
Her smiling face
Is an unsightly sight
In this cyberspace
But how to do it?
Well, I know I can
I just have to come up with
A cunning plan”

While Zentz was planning
Just what to do
Maria’s adventures
On the Internet continued
At every step around her
Round like clock faces
Were thousands of portals
To faraway places
To her left was London
To her right was Rome
There was even a portal
That was labeled ‘home’
But Maria ignored
That gentle reminder
And ventured on with Bing
Creeping nervously behind her
And at every step
Wouldn’t you know?
Strange creatures bid her
A happy hello
There were Bits and Bytes
A fellow called SCSI
And a chip, whose memory
Was, at best, quite fuzzy
He’d ask Maria her name
Say, “that’s pretty” and then
Introduce himself and ask
Maria her name again
This went on for a while
But Maria didn’t mind
For everyone was attentive
Everyone was kind
(And besides she was having
A wonderful time!)

Meanwhile, having calculated
For a minute or two
Zentz had decided
Just what to do
“I’ll send her an e-mail
A friendly hello
And ask that she open
The attachment below
When she does I will enter
Her computer, and she…
Well let’s just say
I’ll take care of Miss Happy!”
So he drew up a plan
And carefully checked through it
Then wrote up an e-mail
And attached himself to it

And off through the Internet
The message did sail
Until it reached Maria
And exclaimed: You just got mail

“Mail?” Said Maria
“This is quite queer
For I’m certain that no one
Knows I am here
Except for you Bing
And the CPU
But someone has sent it
And I wonder who?”

Well, Bing read the e-mail
It was warm and tender
But he noticed that it came
From an anonymous sender
“It says open this attachment
And close your eyes
And you will get a
Big surprise!”
Well that was enough
To convince bunny Bing
That maybe this attachment
Was not such a nice thing
So Bing said: “Maria
Whatever you do
Don’t open the attachment
That was sent to you
We don’t know who sent it
It could be a trap
I think it would be best
If this message were scrapped!”

But Maria didn’t listen
How could there be
Any reason to doubt
A message so friendly?
“Why should anyone tempt me
With a trap or a trick?”
So she pointed her mouse
And gave it a click
Well it was a trap
Just as Bing had feared
For with a deep husky chortle
Zentz the mantis appeared

Well, Zentz cawed and crowed
With a most wicked grin
And said, “Dear girl, I thank you
For inviting me in
What a lovely computer
It’s just right for me
It’s just bursting with succulent
Morsels of memory
I could eat it all up
And that’s just what I’ll do
But first I must take
Care of your bunny and you!”
And evil old Zentz
With his wicked smile
Reached down to snatch up
The bunny and child
But Bing crouched down
And with all of his might
Leapt up over Zentz
And hopped out of sight
“Curses!” cried Zentz
“He’s gotten away
That fool must think
He can save the day
Well, he won’t,” said Zentz
“I’ll have him, and you
And I will devour this
Computer too!”

“You let me go!”
Maria exclaimed
“Why don’t you just go
back from where you came?”
“That’s funny”, said Zentz
“Back from where I came?
My dear, I could tell you
To do the same
This is my world
That you’ve come into
There’s no room in it
For little girls like you”
And saying that
Zentz grabbed some wires and circuits
Made them into a web
And wrapped Maria up in it

Meanwhile, calling for help
Bing furiously hopped
Until he made his way back
To the CPU, and stopped.
“It’s Maria,” he gasped
“She’s in a fix
An evil bug has her
We must save her, quick!”
“A bug?” cried the CPU
“We are all in trouble
I must summon Dr. Cyrus
The Anti-Virus on the double!”

The CPU concentrated
With all of his might
And Dr. Cyrus appeared
In a flash of light
He had silver hair
And wire-rim glasses
And I swear his moustache
Was as thick as molasses
He was wearing a lab coat
And carrying a case
With scraps of paper
Spilling all over the place
He looked like a grandfather
Or a professor would
But if anyone could save Maria
Well, Dr. Cyrus could
So Bing and CPU told him
Of the sad situation
He made a diagnosis
And checked his medications
“Yes, to get rid of that bug
This potion will do”
And with that, Bing and Cyrus
Were off to the rescue

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