Betty Crocker - Food RN

There are so many ads I dislike that it genuinely pleases me when I see one I do. This is a rather droll spot for Betty Crocker's Bisquick, archived on its YouTube channel with extra footage than the 30 second spot. The concept is simple, memorable and absurd, the execution is bang on, especially the sympathetic piano music at the end. Pardon the pun, but it's food for thought. Why can't more ads be this good?

New Kleenex ad 'snot Funny.

Young man, there's no need to feel down. Sure, cold and flu season is upon us, but don't let that worry you. Kleenex is here with a solution, Get Mommed. Yep, it's an insulting website of stereotypes that invites you to source a little added TLC. And yes, they managed to throw in one or two comely ladies for those of you who like your mothering Oedipal.

That in and of itself would be enough to bother me, but it's Kleenex's new ad 'Homecoming' that merits a special level of scorn. Here it is in case you haven't seen it. We'll chat more about it after the break:



Let's recap what we can infer from this lame attempt at humor:

- Young men are inconsiderate douchebags.
- Moms are to be used and abused as you see fit.
- Cold and flu season is a great time to wander around spreading the joy of aching joints and stuffed up noses to moms everywhere like the worst Santa Claus ever.

I know we're supposed to be amused by this young man taking umbrage at the most mundane slights, leaving the moms behind wondering what they did wrong. But moms have an infallible sense of right and wrong, and they may play the martyr, but woe to the ungrateful child who walks all over them. I kept expecting to see one of the moms give the scruffy rapscallion a tongue-lashing, or go Granny from Tweety and Sylvester on his ass with a rolling pin. That would have been preferable. Nope, the ad ends and all of the moms are there behind him. Because that's what moms do in popular culture. They stand by you, no matter how much of a jackass you are. Even when you create ads that suggest moms are nothing more than doormats.

Well, I've done my part. Venture forth, young man. Have fun with your new BFF Jessica. Or enjoy an awkward family reunion with Anna-Maria. And spread your germs like Johnny Appleseed all over the land. You'll be doing your part to keep companies like Kleenex afloat. That's as American as apple pie. And mom.

Karina Smirnoff in new Peta ad

Came across this on the Adweek website this morning. You'd think, with her name, a vodka endorsement would be in the cards, but Dancing With the Stars dancer Karina Smirnoff has chosen PETA instead. It could have been worse: it could have been Yakoff Smirnoff. Wonder what the judges have to say about her pose:

karinaPETA.jpg (JPEG Image, 607x800 pixels) - Scaled (61%)

Ad of the Day: Ozzy Osbourne goes to bat for Samsung again

Since I do work in marketing, and since I've neglected that for the past two months or so, I'm going to correct that over the coming days with some new marketing-related posts. Today, I'm featuring the new Samsung Rogue ad with Ozzy Osbourne, which features more bleeps than an episode of Maury Povich. Ozzy really likes the Rogue. Or maybe he just likes puppies. Without Rosetta Stone language programs for Oz-speak, it's hard to tell.

Palm Pre girl is a rock, she is an island

Though visually very impressive (Tarsem!) I just feel enervated by the The Palm Pre Girl commercials. I mean, here's this girl talking in disconnected vaguely poetic speech patters more halting than William Shatner about her life never once noticing that she is surrounded by people twirling and rearranging themselves for her. Talk about solipsistic. It's like the Palm Pre ads are saying, 'Forget about the world beyond you. Enjoy this shiny object that makes you think you control it.'

So I'm pleased to say that someone has decided to chronicle the life of the Palm Pre Girl on Twitter with brilliant non-sequiturs like, This rock. I've decided. To name it Sylvester' and 'It's hard to tweet. And juggle.' If the Palm Pre ads had half this much wit, I'd take more notice of them...

MrWordsWorth on Pepsi, Olive Garden Slogans, For What it's Worth...

Slogans are vital. They encapsulate the essence of your company, your product, your service. They're like a promise, or a come-on. People hear them and immediately they know who you are and what you do, and why they want to make you their hero over some other brand zero.

Advertising agencies have produced many great slogans over the years. 'You're in good hands with Allstate.' 'Reach out & Touch Someone' 'The quicker picker upper.' 'Raise your hand if you're sure.' 'It takes a licking & keeps on ticking.' These slogans tell a story, make a promise. You hear them and you know what the product or service is all about.

There are two things that slogans shouldn't do: confuse or raise questions that undermine the warm and fuzzies you want to evoke. Take Pepsi Canada, for example. Last month, it unveiled, with creative from BBDO, a new slogan: Joy it Forward. I'm guessing someone was channel surfing and came upon the movie Pay it Forward and had a revelation.

The movie, and the book it was based on, are several years behind us. So it's hard to believe that it would have served as the inspiration. But that's not the real problem I have with the slogan. My real problem is it neither makes sense, nor does it say anything specific about Pepsi. Joy it Forward is generic enough that any company, from Hallmark Cards to Betty Crocker, could use it. It's meaningless. And it feels like it was created by pouring a box of Magnetic Poetry on a table and determining the constituent words through a process of elimination. 'Well, we want to say something about happiness, and progress, but in a very vague way.' It lacks substance, specificity and effervescence.

Meanwhile, Olive Garden has been running a commercial that ends with the line: 'When You're Here, You're Family.' Nice sentiment, but it raises an unnecessary question in the mind of the consumer: what am I when I'm not at Olive Garden? Inconsequential? Contemptuous? Do you talk trash about me and my clothes? These are the kinds of ruminations you don't want your slogan to inspire, Olive Garden.

Of course, these are just my perspectives. Perhaps you like these slogans, and you're not even affiliated with the companies above. I hope you'll share why. More important. I hope you'll think on this when it comes time to tell your story in a slogan. And I hope you'll leave the magnetic poetry on the fridge.

Worthy Award - Banner achievement in Banner ads

So many banner ads, so little reason to click through. So when you hear that one actually earned a Cannes Lion , you can't help but be curious.

So I'm pleased to say that this Pringles ad is not only Canne worthy, it's Words Worthy. It looks like just another dumb banner (a fact it eventually concedes), until you do its bidding and start clicking. Once you start clicking, you're compelled to work your way to the end, much like your favorite Pringles Flavor. Well, maybe you haven't. Man, I'm so embarrassed.

It's entertaining and, occasionally, absurd, making hay of other banner ads for their execution and results. But most important of all, it's delightfully fun. And much like the Pringles canister, you will eventually reach the end if you do click long enough. So congratulations Bridge Worldwide . You're not only Cannes worthy, you're Words Worthy. I know, I know, it's a big deal for you. Too bad I don't have any awards. I might could buy you a can of Pringles and bronze it...

Organ grinding from Burger King + Hardee's

Friends, I am a marketer. I'm also a consumer. Which means I'm open to persuasion. I like creative that is sophisticated and subtle. I want to sense that there is an intelligence, a wit behind the effort. I want a reason to believe, a little wooing. What I don't want is clumsy, heavy handed pawing so I feel like I got worked over or used.

Frankly, friends, I'm feeling that way about recent marketing campaigns by Hardee's and Burger King. All of the qualities I talked about above have been rapaciously ripped from the playbooks of these two fast food chains. They want attention. They want to be talked about. Well, they have my attention, but I doubt they'll like what I have to say.

We have to start somewhere, so let's start with a promotional item for Burger King's Super Seven Incher . The new advert, which is labeled "It'll blow your mind away", features a very plastic looking lady, mouth wide open, ready to, um, enjoy a very phallic looking sub-style burger. The copy is full of innuendo that would be cheap; if it wasn't tired and borrowed: "Fill your desire for something long, juicy and flame grilled... Yearn for more..." No mistaking it, it's food porn, or forn (pood would sound more unseemly).

What strikes me as odd is that, much like most recent BK ads, this appears to be geared toward a young, testosterone fueled, heterosexual male audience. So why the heavily phallic text? I can't see the appetite of that audience being whetted by a sandwich that is described much like male genitalia. Maybe it's meant to be subversive. Or BK just assumes it's audience is illiterate and won't read the copy. I don't know. It's leering, tacky and dumb, and it makes the sandwich sound unappealing. Speaking of which, I like how the words "It'll blow" appear on one line all by themselves, suggesting not oral pleasure, but a crappy meal. Which befits the crappy creative.

Aiming slightly lower, figuratively if not literally, is a Hardee's ad announcing its new Biscuit Holes. They are tubby little bundles of dough, or something, that look fried and are served (You thought I was going to say 'come', didn't you?) with icing. The slightly shaggy and not too young man who introduces these confectionery concoctions - a kind of poor man's Tom Green - does a man on the street bit to ask folks to think of a better handle for these gustatory treats. (You can actually do this at Hardee's NameOurHoles website .) What follows in the ad can basically be summed up as a series of euphemisms for testes. We get 'goodie balls,' 'Frosty Dippers', 'Sweet Balls', 'CinniNuts','TastiNuts', 'DingleBalls,''Melting Holes'...

Okay, so the last one sounds more like some kind of anal infection. Regardless, it doesn't make the prospect of eating them very palatable. I have this rule: the last thing I want to think about when I enjoy a nice snack is any part of the human anatomy, male or female. But what do I know? Seriously, Hardee's, if you really want us to associate your snack with the testes, why don't you package them in a sack? Again, insipid creative like this is enough to put me off my appetite. But since you asked for names, Hardee's, I'll bite. Call them Dingleberreez. There. Call me. The ball's in your court.

What do you think? Are they crass, or do you like the sass?