Verse: Spot

We gave you
to December

Not to the tumors
or the infections

Not to the half hour
spent trying to stop
the blood

or the desperate cries
as we bundled you
into the tattered
blue towel

We gave you
to December

Not to the
concerned clinician

Nor the
cold reflective steel
of the examination table

We gave you
to December

Not to those
nagging fluorescents
at 1:00 a.m.

Not to the doctor
who carried you away

We gave you
to December

The warm purr
that rippled
your matted fur

The woolly paws
noodging the sterile
air

Did you know
I looked back
as I left?

Did you know
we were leaving you?

We gave you
to December

And no soft snow
to cover your head
or absolve us
of our guilt

Or to absorb
the wordless
silent cry
that took me
by surprise
left me gasping
for air
on Willow
yesterday

My heart
is sick
with sadness

My heart
is blemished