Verse: Fragment of a Rainy Season

Billie, you exclaimed
and a smile of recognition
crept across your face
as For All We Know
played softly
that misty afternoon
while we ate
in the lonesome
crowded cafe

Here's what I know
you said
it gets darker
as you go along
you tend to
repeat yourself
and harbour dark thoughts
about what you've done
what you've become

You love awhile
sometimes, it's lonely
you take your comforts
where you can
a glass of wine
a familiar song
late night conversations
with ghosts
and you wonder
what did it amount to
what did I accomplish
what difference
did it make
and who will remember
me when I am consigned
to memories

Years spent living
with myself, with others
you'd think, by now
I would know
who I am
but it changes
like seasons
like fashions
a child
a mother
a sister
a lover
it's all associations
you lose yourself
in proximities
like chalk marks
in the rain
it's just temporary

and the traffic
moves like a funeral procession
and this moment
lingers like
eternity
like an insect
in amber
it imprisons me
the malingering mist
with its quiet apathy
afflicts me
but what does anyone
know, anyway, Billie
so much I might have done
so little time, like anyone
I just want to know
that I can get something
of value done
that I can stop arriving
and be present
and genuine
and be someone